Month: December 2016

T’was the week before Christmas and all through the store,
customers were shopping for holiday deals galore!
There was Christmas candy as far as the eye can see,
and giant stuffed animals to go under everyone’s tree!
Wrapping paper, in green, blue, and red,
in long tubes to bonk people over the head:
for those who are silly, like the 3 Stooges;
not bah-hum-buggy grouches, or Ebenezer Scrooges.
There were gift cards that gave bonus points for cheap car fuel.
“Oh boy!” customers said. “So incredibly cool!”
Big, juicy hams less than two bucks a pound.
Oh my, how delicious does that sound?

Thousands of people milling about,
swarming around, in the store and out.
From 9 in the morning til the end of the day,
the crowds threatened to sweep the workers away!
Upon seeing the massive Yuletide rush,
there arose from Kroger employees a great fuss!

Craig, Santa’s produce elf,
hurried back and forth and worried to himself
and said aloud with dismay in his eyes,
“How the heck will we ever survive?!
Sweet potatoes and cabbage are selling like hot cakes!
There’s no way that they’ll last until daybreak!
Our produce truck better get here on the double,
or else I guarantee there will be trouble!”
Olivia, his assistant, nodded and agreed,
“The truck better be here, even if we have to beg and plead.
Because I don’t want to hear customers yelling,
‘Hey! Why don’t you have any honeydew melon?!'”

The grocery clerks were struck with fear,
running about and saying “Oh dear!
Everyone’s snatching up sugar and flour!
If we run out of them, people’s attitudes will turn sour.”
Erik was stocking nonstop, watching and scratching his head,
wondering how to keep the huge crowds fed.
It was a problem he could not quite manage alone,
because when everything was all said and done,
the Grocery department’s shelves in a day would be wiped clean.
And he knew what that would mean.
His new stock had better make it in overnight,
or customers would want to argue and fight
with him or any workers who got in their way.
And for real, dude, that’s not OK.

Chauncey kept things up front under control,
walking the beat like a cop on patrol,
making announcements about good deals on wine,
and hoping his cashiers would come in on time.
He didn’t want to summon backup help,
and pull the stockers away from the shelf.
If he did, he’d have to call “Customer first!”
And other workers would say “This day is the worst!
We can’t get anything done around here!
After work we’re drowning our sorrows in beer.”

And then there was the rest of the crew:
Lisa and Manny and Denise too;
and Justin and Thelma and Marsha and Matt;
all working their tails off, so that
they could get their own Christmas tasks done,
after long days of hard-fought victories won.
All of them had their stomachs full
of Mountain Dew, coffee, and Red Bull.
It kept them energized throughout the day,
so they could handle whatever happened, come what may.
Around and around the clock they worked,
with mostly nice customers, but a few jerks
who were thrown in for good measure.
Dealing with them was not a pleasure.

Right in the middle of all of this,
something happened to add to the craziness.
From the back of the store there came a commotion!
And Matt ran towards it in what seemed like slow motion!
A display of Santa plates had crashed to the floor,
with customers and workers watching in horror.
And Matt, with his sweaty face a red glow,
said “Santa drank too much spiked egg nog! Uh oh!”
The call from the intercom followed pretty quick.
“Utilities, clean up on aisle 6!”

But for everyone feeling hustled and stressed,
there were others who seemed to possess
a sense of humor and calmness and peace,
which provided some relief
from the craziness and worries of the day,
and helped keep everyone’s anxiety at bay.
Jeremy, the Starbucks guy,
said to everyone with happiness in his eyes,
“Don’t worry, we have lots of peppermint mocha!
Enough caffeine to make you want to polka
all the way across the store!
A good sized boost to last a day or more!”

Mr. Hoffman was an easygoing fellow.
A happy guy, and pretty mellow.
Walking around all over the place
with lots of jokes and a smile on his face.

There was Mark, who nicknamed everyone “Mama”
and used silliness and laughter to dispel the drama
and weariness of working overtime holiday hours.
His humor had the ability to overpower
everyone’s feelings of tiredness and stress,
and their irritability and grumpiness.

At the customer service desk there was Trevor,
who thought he was very clever
with his jokes, his pranks, and his funny antics.
He thought that stuff was all fantastic.
One afternoon he sneaked up behind Mark,
leaned towards his ear, and loudly barked.
From the front end there came a sound
that was quite unearthly.
Turns out poor Mark was screaming like a banshee.
“Trevor!” he gasped, “Why the heck did you do that?!”
“You just about gave me a heart attack!”
And Trevor, convulsing in laughter from head to toe,
replied, “I know I did! It was pretty funny though!”

Eventually it came to Christmas Eve.
At 6 pm everyone could take their leave,
go home, eat dinner and unwind
and sleep late without going back to the grind.
One more big day to get through!
One more work day for the week! WOOHOO!
The clock that day became everyone’s friend,
all the workers watching and waiting for the day to end.
Everyone going in overdrive,
glad to make it through the week alive.
Tons of customers in all the checkout lines,
hurrying to buy their Christmas food in time,
so they could run back home to cook
their favorite dishes from their family recipe books.
Many of them would go to church later that day,
to celebrate Jesus’ birthday
and return home to get a good night’s sleep,
and snuggle in their beds with nary a peep.
All the workers were off Christmas Day,
and happily shouted, “Hooray!
We made it through a hard week at Kroger!
We’re so glad that it’s finally over!”
They all got a well-deserved rest.
Their patience, other people could not test.

Each year, the holidays would be the same,
with some veteran workers and some new names.
Working through all the craziness together,
any chaos that came up, they would weather.
Every Christmas this would come to pass,
and no one knows how long the cycle will last.
This is where the story ends.
I hope you have enjoyed it, friends,
and all others who took the time to read,
so you could have a look and see
what happens at Kroger day to day
especially during the holidays.
The hustling, bustling, goofiness and laughter,
and the stress and the constant chasing after
our means of making a living,
during this very busy season of giving.
We hope that you’ll shop with us again,
that you’ll come back and see us when
you’re buying food with a hungry family to feed.
We’ll still be here to meet your grocery needs.
No matter how long the lines are at checkout,
we’ll take care of you without a doubt.
And even with all of our worries and rush,
here’s a holiday message from all of us;
since I had failed to mention it before:
Merry Christmas from your 592 Kroger store!